Posts Tagged ‘codpiece’

Well this weekend was a little bit of an adventure.

It was my daughters 13th birthday, yes the dreaded teenage years have now started for me, and after 3 days I can see no sign of it truly kicking in, I keep my fingers crossed that it stays this way for the next 6 years!!!!! I remain hopeful but will not be holding my breath!

For those of you that don't know this is Kevin from Kevin and Perry - Google it!!

So for her birthday she thought it would be a good idea to go climbing trees with her beloved, mother, father, brother and best friend!! Great except I’m 39 people and not the fittest person in the world, oh the thought of climbing trees and crashing to the ground on a zip wire fills me with dread and fear!

But it is her day after all and so I book the day to find out the only time available is either 8.00 am or 5.00pm and yes I did book way in advance, it must be a popular thing to do these days!! So I opted for the 8.00 am as we were having a party at 4.30pm!!!

So I am awake at 6.20 am, prising my eyes open wondering why I have decided to wake up so early and agreed to go climbing really really big trees, oh yes I remember I have a teenager in the house!!!! She sat on our bed opening cards and presents until we had a mad rush to get ready to go pick up the best friend before traipsing off to the Go Ape site near our home!!

I later find out that it is quite a low site with the highest peak being 14 M so not to bad and actually I have to admit I had a wail of a time!

Tree Monkey!!!

My son who is 10 had an amazing time, I was rather worried about him, but he flew around the course like a little tree monkey!!

When we arrived we had to fill in forms then we had to get harnessed up, putting our legs through stirrups and having the harness tightened around our waists turning my muffin top into some sort of huge oversized jelly wobble that only ever looks attractive on a Great Whale! 

I want to know how he got into a deck chair in the first place!

Oh the  embarrassment but that was nothing compared to Max who had the unfortune of being a man and having his man hood squeezed into the middle of the harness making it look like he had come out in a cod piece!! The even more added embarrassment  for the other men in our party who looked like they where in fact women with just deep voices – I’ll leave you to work out the reference if you can!!!! But thankfully that was all you had to wear, you could wear your own clothes and shoes! I recommend that you where something around your middle that is comfortable as the harness does pull on you!!

Once we are all suited and booted we sat for our tutorial of how to use all the necessary straps and hooks, I would say that in our slot there was about 15 or so people, we got to go third as we had 5 in our team followed by a team of youngish people team building or something but they had a laugh and made it a little fun! With one man moaning that he had to wear a special harness because and quote ‘ I’m a fat boy, I have a fat boys harness on’. Poor man how to get yourself a complex easy go to Go Ape if you have body issues they are sure to make them worse with the tightened harness!!

Having said all of that after the training and safety procedures we could go off by ourselves and start on the 5 stage course, climbing up and then eventually going down zip wires at different levels before starting all over again!!

Zip Wire

Our local Go Ape centre is in Moors Valley Country Park in Hampshire not far from where we live in Bournemouth, the team made you feel welcome and at the end we received a little certificate to say that we had completed the course, it’s a great starter course too as its not to high. My brother lives in Pickering, West Yorkshire and his local go ape is some 35 Metres tall so that is going to be our next go ape adventure!!!

If you want to read more or want to find your local go ape centre read more here – http://www.goape.co.uk/

See you soon


Foxy P


Read Full Post »